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Summary
Summary
NATIONAL BESTSELLER
From the host of the podcast Terrible, Thanks for Asking --called "a gift" by The New York Times --a raw and humorous essay collection in the spirit of Jenny Lawson and Samantha Irby.
Nora McInerny does not dance like no one is watching. In fact, she dances like everyone is watching, which is to say, she does not dance at all. A bestselling author and host of the beloved podcast Terrible, Thanks for Asking , she has captured the hearts of millions with her disarming and earnest approach to discussing grief and loss. Now, with Bad Vibes Only , she turns her eye on our aggressively, oppressively optimistic culture, our obsession with self-improvement, and what it really means to live authentically in the online age.
In essays that revisit her cringey past and anticipate her rapidly approaching, early middle-aged future, McInerny lays bare her own chaos, inviting us to drop the façade of perfection and embrace the truth: that we are all--at best--slightly unhinged. Socrates claimed that the unexamined life is not worth living. Bad Vibes Only is for people who have taken that dictum a bit too far--the overthinkers, the analyzers, the recovering Girl Bosses, and the burned-out personal brand--reminding us that a life worth living is about more than just "good vibes."
Author Notes
Nora McInerny was voted Most Humorous by the Annunciation Catholic School Class of 1997. Since then, she's written the bestselling memoirs It's Okay to Laugh (Crying Is Cool Too ) and No Happy Endings , as well as The Hot Young Widows Club and Bad Moms. She hosts the award-winning podcast Terrible, Thanks for Asking , has spoken on TED's mainstage, and has contributed to publications like The New York Times , Time , Slate , and Vox . She is very tall.
Reviews (3)
Publisher's Weekly Review
McInerny (No Happy Endings), host of the podcast Terrible, Thanks for Asking, presents a humorous look at her life with essays aimed at "people who cannot help but put a little sprinkle of sadness on their happiest memories." Self-described as anxious ("I was a child who lay in bed crying about pain I hadn't yet experienced"), McInerny charts her search for authenticity, while meditating on everything from aging to mental health and parenthood. "Siri, Am I Losing My Mind?" reflects on memory loss and selfhood as McInerny contends with her aunt's dementia, while "Privacy Settings" reckons with another loss--that of McInerny's husband, who died from brain cancer at 35--and how social media gave the author an unexpected space to grieve and share the growth of their son: "Along with dopamine and validation, Instagram stepped into the role of witness for Ralph's and my life." There are welcome dashes of levity, too: "Strongest Girl in the World" recalls the joys of McInerny's free-range childhood in the 1980s, and "Reunion" offers a raucous reflection on aging via a weed edible trip gone hilariously wrong. Occasionally, McInerny's meditations can seem unfocused--"Unravel with Me," a story about a past elementary school teacher, lives up to its name--but her wit, vulnerability, and self-deprecation make her an enjoyable companion. Despite the title, this is nothing but a good time. (Oct.)
Kirkus Review
Essays about aging and optimism by an Irish American writer and mother. In the introduction, McInerny--host of the podcast Terrible, Thanks for Asking and author of It's Okay To Laugh (Crying Is Cool Too) and The Hot Young Widows Club--dismisses unbridled, uncritical productivity: "I don't want to live in a world where the only vibes are bad, but I cannot stay for long in a room where the only vibes allowed are the pleasant ones, either." It is a fitting beginning for the variety of essays that follow, which examine how life's greatest pleasures are often intertwined with danger, anxiety, and pain. In one essay, for example, the author writes about the time that she and her cousin slipped away during a family vacation, commandeered a canoe, and disappeared for eight hours as they paddled miles to town and back. After a harrowing, exhausting trip, they prepared themselves for a severe punishment only to find that their families never noticed that they were gone. In another piece, the author writes about the horror of accidentally leaving her 4-year-old son in a car for an hour after a family hike. "It is the rock in our shoe," she writes, "the pea beneath a pile of mattresses, the time I almost killed our child with my mindlessness. He can say he forgives me, sure, but I know better. In therapy, I work on forgiving myself." In "Asking for a Friend," McInerny confesses how, when her first husband died, her grief-stricken behavior nearly ruined her most important friendships. Lighter pieces explore everything from taking too many edibles at a high school reunion to beauty treatments that supposedly fight aging. The most successful essays perfectly balance vulnerability and humor to lead readers to gentle, compassionate insights. While most of the author's conclusions are not particularly original, her appealing voice keeps the pages turning. A lighthearted, mostly rewarding, not-particularly-profound collection. Copyright (c) Kirkus Reviews, used with permission.
Booklist Review
We're all called to face impossible times, and we don't always do it with grace. McInerny isn't afraid to attack these challenges and speaks frankly about alcoholism, depression, her husband's death from cancer, and an aunt with dementia. Her gift is addressing these grim topics with humor and insight. "I have always been the saddest happy person I know or the happiest sad person," McInerny writes. And lucky for us, she's willing to share. Whether she's recalling a college friend who danced drunkenly on bar tops who later became a nun, or attending a high-school reunion, this author can find a hilarious twist. Childhood adventures, competitive parenting, the lure of social media, and emotional therapy are all served up with groans and laughs. The author is a millennial nearing middle age, but her experiences are told with fierce honesty that will resonate with a wide range of readers, reminding them that it's all right to not always be "fine" when someone asks. Fans of McInerny's popular podcast, Terrible, Thanks for Asking, will line up.
Table of Contents
| Before We Begin | p. xiii |
| 1 It Hurts to Be Beautiful | p. 1 |
| 2 Hello, Me | p. 11 |
| 3 Sin, Am I Losing My Mind? | p. 19 |
| 4 Holy Envy | p. 29 |
| 5 The Craving | p. 39 |
| 6 Privacy Settings | p. 49 |
| 7 Who Would You Be? | p. 63 |
| 8 Strongest Girl in the World | p. 71 |
| 9 Reunion | p. 83 |
| 10 Stay-At-Home Mom | p. 97 |
| 11 Is This Good? | p. 105 |
| 12 Competitive Parenting Association | p. 111 |
| 13 Unravel with Me | p. 121 |
| 14 Asking for a Friend | p. 127 |
| 15 Bad Bosses | p. 139 |
| 16 Anything Can Happen | p. 157 |
| 17 Anyone Can Do It | p. 169 |
| 18 Something Substantial | p. 179 |
| 19 Good, Better, Best | p. 191 |
| Acknowledgments | p. 201 |
