Cover image for Raising the challenging child : how to minimize meltdowns, reduce conflict, and increase cooperation
Raising the challenging child : how to minimize meltdowns, reduce conflict, and increase cooperation

Physical Description:
268 pages ; 23 cm.
Part 1: Be a leader -- Part 2: Dig deeper -- Part 3: Prepare for success.
Child behavior experts empower frustrated parents with proven, practical advice on how to minimize behavior meltdowns, reduce conflict, increase cooperation, promote healthy attachment, and improve family relations. --


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Book 649.1 BUC 1 1
Book 649.1 BUC 0 1
Book 649.1 BUC 0 1

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What's the worst you've ever faced as a parent? An all-out tantrum at the mall? A son who won't take out his earbuds to listen to you? A daughter who's failing at school and won't do her homework? A teen who constantly breaks curfew? A call from the police? Whatever you're dealing with, Raising the Challenging Child will help.

Building on their work at Chaddock, a nonprofit organization that has worked with some of the most challenging kids in the nation for more than 150 years, the authors empower frustrated parents with practical tips and real-life examples on how to

- minimize behavioral meltdowns
- reduce conflict
- increase cooperation
- promote healthy attachment
- improve family relationships

The strategies they share work both for the child who is going through a difficult phase brought on by life disruption or trauma, and for the child who faces chronic struggles. Parents, teachers, and those who work with children and youth will find positive, practical steps they can start taking today in order to understand and address the baffling behavior of the child under their care.

Author Notes

Karen Doyle Buckwalter , MSW, LCSW, is director of program strategy at Chaddock in Quincy, Illinois. She serves on the board of directors' advisory board of the Theraplay® Institute in Chicago and has trained and consulted at family behavioral health organizations and youth foster care centers in the US, the UK, Australia, Denmark, and beyond. In addition to her degrees, Karen completed a two-year marriage and family therapy training program and 500-plus hours in diverse modalities including Theraplay®, Trust-Based Relational Intervention (TBRI), and other attachment, trauma, and developmental approaches. Debbie Reed is president and CEO of Chaddock. Currently engaged in doctoral studies, she has also played a leadership role in child- and family-serving organizations at the state and national levels, including the Illinois Department of Children and Family Services' Child Welfare Advisory Committee, the CEO council of the internationally recognized Alliance for Strong Families and Communities, and the national board of the United Methodist Association of Health and Welfare Ministries. In addition, she trains and consults with organizations on topics related to nonprofit leadership. Wendy Lyons Sunshine is an award-winning writer and coauthor of The Connected Child , with over a quarter million copies sold. She is an editorial consultant for leading nonprofits and has written for media outlets including Health , AARP magazine, Scientific American , American Way , and the New York Times .

Table of Contents

Acknowledgmentsp. 9
Introductionp. 11
Part 1 Be a Leader
1 Invest in the Relationship Bankp. 17
2 Let Everyone Calm Downp. 27
3 Take Charge and Stay in Chargep. 37
4 Provide Clear, Consistent Limitsp. 47
5 Balance Structure and Nurturep. 57
6 Respond, Don't Reactp. 67
7 Share Power to Gain Powerp. 73
8 Be Playful and Surprisingp. 79
9 Apologize If You Make a Mistakep. 87
10 Keep the Goal in Mindp. 91
Part 2 Dig Deeper
11 Respond to What's beneath Behaviorsp. 97
12 It's Okay to Revisit an Earlier Stagep. 111
13 Real Solutions Involve the Whole Familyp. 117
14 Change Up Your Steps in the Dancep. 123
15 Don't Ask, "What's Wrong?"p. 131
16 All Kids Do Goofy Thingsp. 139
17 Help a Child Feel Validated and Valuedp. 149
18 Talking Back Is Better Than Hittingp. 155
19 Celebrate Who Your Child Really Isp. 161
20 Look for What's behind Your Own Reactionsp. 169
Part 3 Prepare for Success
21 Take Care of Yourselfp. 183
22 Say It without Nop. 191
23 Every Two Hours, Feed and Water the Kidsp. 193
24 Stay Alert to What Your Child Really Needsp. 199
25 Do It Togetherp. 209
26 Give Healthy Touchp. 215
27 Be Present for the Teachable Momentsp. 223
28 Rehearse for Tough Situationsp. 231
29 Expect Some Conflictp. 237
30 The Gift Your Child Wants Is Youp. 245
Resourcesp. 251