Cover image for Believe me : how trusting women can change the world
Title:
Believe me : how trusting women can change the world
ISBN:
9781580058797
Edition:
1st ed.
Physical Description:
xiii, 321 pages : illustrations ; 22 cm.
Contents:
Our word alone / How Bertha Pappenheim cured herself / Gossip is an English word: 500+ years of #MeToo in Indian Country / The room where it happened / Listening will never be enough / He's unmarked, she's marked / We belong everywhere / Nowhere left to go: misogyny and belief on the left / Constructing the future: the believe me internet / Can BDSM save us?: Centering enthusiastic consent in queer worlds / Clocked / Do not pet / The power of survivor-defined justice / Before #MeToo: Black women in the anti-rape movement in Washington, DC, in the 1970s / I believe you, como eres / Reproductive justice: sacred work, sacred journey / The spark to change / She can't breathe / Taking the employer high road to address sexual harassment / Big little lies / Innocent in the face: a conversation with Tatiana Maslany / Jacklyn Friedman -- When gender is weaponized, peace depends on believing survivors / Silenced and doubted: how the US immigration system fails Central American women / Survivorship is leadership: building a future for new possibilities and power / Survivor love letter / The cost of disbelieving
Added Author:
Summary:
Harvey Weinstein. Brett Kavanaugh. Jeffrey Epstein. Donald Trump. The most infamous abusers in modern American history are being outed as women speak up to publicly expose behavior that was previously only whispered about -- and it's both making an impact, and sparking a backlash. From the leading, agenda-setting feminist editors of Yes Means Yes, Believe Me brings readers into the evolving landscape of the movement against sexual violence, and outlines how trusting women is the critical foundation for future progress. In Believe Me, contributors ask and answer the crucial question: What would happen if we didn't just believe women, but acted as though they matter? If we take women's experiences of online harassment seriously, it will transform the internet. If we listen to and center survivors, we could revolutionize our systems of justice. If we believe Black women when they talk about pain, we will save countless lives. With contributions from many of the most important voices in feminism today, Believe Me is an essential roadmap for the #MeToo era and beyond. --
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Summary

Summary

What would happen if we believed women? A groundbreaking anthology offers a potent rallying cry and theory of change
Harvey Weinstein. Brett Kavanaugh. Jeffrey Epstein. Donald Trump. The most infamous abusers in modern American history are being outed as women speak up to publicly expose behavior that was previously only whispered about -- and it's both making an impact, and sparking a backlash. From the leading, agenda-setting feminist editors of Yes Means Yes , Believe Me brings readers into the evolving landscape of the movement against sexual violence, and outlines how trusting women is the critical foundation for future progress.
In Believe Me , contributors ask and answer the crucial question: What would happen if we didn't just believe women, but acted as though they matter? If we take women's experiences of online harassment seriously, it will transform the internet. If we listen to and center survivors, we could revolutionize our systems of justice. If we believe Black women when they talk about pain, we will save countless lives.
With contributions from many of the most important voices in feminism today, Believe Me is an essential roadmap for the #MeToo era and beyond.


Author Notes

Jaclyn Friedman 's work has redefined the concept of "healthy sexuality" and popularised the "yes means yes" standard of sexual consent that is quickly becoming law on many U.S. campuses. She is a popular speaker and opinion writer and the author of three books. Friedman hosts Unscrewed, a podcast exploring paths to sexual liberation, named a Best Sex Podcast by both Marie Claire and Esquire . Jessica Valenti is the author of multiple books on feminism, politics and culture. Jessica is also the founder of Feministing.com. Her writing has appeared in publications like the New York Times , the Washington Post , Nation , and Ms. magazine. She is currently a columnist at the Guardian US. Jessica lives in Brooklyn with her husband and daughter.


Reviews 3

Publisher's Weekly Review

In this urgent essay collection, feminist activists Valenti and Friedman (Yes Means Yes!) bring together a diverse range of contributors to address the backlash to the #MeToo movement and make the case for "a simple but radical trust in women." Noting that the Polaroid camera helped to decrease domestic violence rates by providing victims with immediate and tangible proof to take to police, Valenti argues that the internet is enacting a "cultural shift" around sexual abuse by allowing women to share and affirm their personal experiences. Moira Donegan, creator of the Shitty Media Men list, contends that Sigmund Freud's disavowal of his initial findings on the links between hysteria and widespread sexual abuse set the template for the public's reaction to rape accusations. Slate editor Dahlia Lithwick describes the dueling congressional testimonies of Christine Blasey Ford and Supreme Court nominee Brett Kavanaugh, while Rolling Stone writer Jamil Smith explores intersections between rape culture and racism in the outing of Bill Cosby as a serial rapist. Many contributors, including Congresswoman Ayanna Pressley, note the importance of not just believing abuse survivors, but achieving credible justice for them as well. Consistently well-written and soundly reasoned, these essays persuasively cast the tendency to doubt women as one of America's greatest social ills. This illuminating call to action deserves a wide readership. (Jan.)


Booklist Review

Feminist writers Valenti and Friedman's (Yes Means Yes! Visions of Female Sexual Power and a World Without Rape, 2009) second collaboration is a collection of essays about the varied ways that women's voices have been excluded, often due to shame and violence, and how that narrative must change and is changing. A diverse group of writers tackles the book's subtitle in a multitude of ways. Essayist Samantha Irby discusses doctors' dismissal of black women's pain; Slate editor Dahlia Lithwick parses through the testimonies of Christine Blasey Ford and Brett Kavanaugh; former marine Anuradha Bhagwati writes of the military, PTSD, and her service dog; and Congresswoman Ayanna Pressley speaks to the importance of listening to sexual abuse and assault survivors in the name of justice. Much of the collection revolves around communities, both in person and virtual, that provide affirmation and support but can also be a form of retribution in the face of disregard from law enforcement. This is a varied, timely, and accessible collection that will garner attention.--Kathy Sexton Copyright 2019 Booklist


Library Journal Review

Valenti and Friedman (coauthors, Yes Means Yes!) invite activists to share the impact of people having confidence in women and their stories. In this collection, writers such as comedian Samantha Irby, Congresswoman Ayanna Pressley, author Matt Lubchansky, and activist Yanar Mohammed do not soften their message but tell, unequivocally, stories of their own experiences with not being believed and the stories of others, whether about sexual assault, medical need, or the lack of safety in their home. Standout essays include Friedman's, which names the reasons why these stories matter; Tina Horn's meditation on sex work; and Jamil Smith's on his awakening to his own behavior and its contribution to violence against women. To select only three top essays does this excellent collection, however, a disservice. Each piece stands robustly on its own, drawing readers in. The writers make their arguments in accessible, compelling prose. VERDICT Though this collection ultimately preaches to its own choir, the book easily arms feminist activists with valuable content with which to stride forward in engaging misogyny in the world. An inclusive and essential choice following We Should All Be Feminists, and a must-have for the modern reader.--Abby Hargreaves, District of Columbia P.L.


Table of Contents

Jessica ValentiMoira DoneganSarah Deer and Bonnie ClairmontDahlia LithwickKatherine CrossJulia SeranoSoraya Nadia McDonaldCongresswoman Ayanna PressleySady DoyleSoraya ChemalyTina HornSassafras LowreyMatt LubchanskyAnuradha BhagwatiStacy Malone, ESQ.Loretta J. RossAndrea L. Pino-SilvaCherisse ScottTahir DuckettJamil SmithMónica RamírezSamantha IrbyJaclyn FriedmanYifat Susskind and Yanar MohammedAnna-Catherine BrigidaSabrina Hersi IssaTani IkedaJaclyn Friedman
Introductionp. ix
Our Word Alonep. 1
How Bertha Pappenheim Cured Herselfp. 7
Gossip Is an English Word 500+ Years of #MeToo in Indian Countryp. 15
The Room Where It Happenedp. 25
Listening Will Never Be Enoughp. 35
He's Unmarked, She's Markedp. 51
"Believe Me" Means Believing That Black Women Are Peoplep. 64
We Belong Everywherep. 77
Nowhere Left to Go: Misogyny and Belief on the Leftp. 83
Constructing the Future: The Believe Me Internetp. 93
Yeah, You Like That, Don't You? The Unnecessary Pleasures of Sexual Laborp. 111
Can BDSM Save Us? Centering Enthusiastic Consent in Queer Worldsp. 124
Clockedp. 133
Do Not Petp. 135
The Power of Survivor-Defined Justicep. 150
Before #MeToo: Black Women in the Anti-Rape Movement in Washington, DC, in the 1970sp. 162
Believe You, Como Eresp. 177
Reproductive Justice: Sacred Work, Sacred Journeyp. 187
The Spark to Changep. 197
She Can't Breathep. 209
Taking the Employer High Road to Address Sexual Harassmentp. 218
Big Little Liesp. 232
Innocent in the Face: A Conversation with Tatiana Maslanyp. 240
When Gender Is Weaponized, Peace Depends on Believing Survivorsp. 255
Silenced and Doubted: How the US Immigration System Fails Central American Womenp. 267
Survivorship Is Leadership: Building a Future for New Possibilities and Powerp. 278
Survivor Love Letterp. 291
The Cost of Disbelievingp. 299