Scary close : dropping the act and finding true intimacy

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Title:

Scary close : dropping the act and finding true intimacy

Author:

Miller, Donald, 1971- author.

ISBN:

9780785213185

9780718035679

Physical Description:

xvi, 231 pages ; 22 cm.

Contents:

Foreword / by Bob Goff -- The distracting noises of insecurity -- You are good at relationships -- Everybody's got a story and it's not the one they're telling -- Why some animals make themselves look bigger than they are -- Three things I learned about relationships from swimming in a pond -- Performance anxiety in real life -- The people we choose to love -- Control freak -- Five kinds of manipulators -- Lucy in the kitchen -- The risk of being careful -- Great parents do this well -- The stuff of a meaningful life -- Do men do intimacy differently? -- You will not complete me -- The place we left our ghosts.

Personal Subject:

Miller, Donald, 1971--Relations with women.

Subject Term:

Intimacy (Psychology)

Man-woman relationships.

Mate selection.

Summary:

When fling after fling led to lots of drama and a long series of heartaches, Donald Miller decided he'd had enough. There must be a better way to soothe loneliness without jumping on a roller coaster, to feel affirmation without putting on a show, to find true love. It wasn't just about finding the right girl, though that helped. Once he found her, he had to know what to do or "who to be." A manipulative control freak? A successful workaholic? His usual methods had drawbacks. But the alternatives were not just hard to do; they were hard to imagine. Nevertheless, at forty years old he made a scary decision: to be himself no matter what it cost.

Holds:

Available:*

Library	Call Number	Status
Searching... R.H. Stafford Library (Woodbury)	158.2 MIL	Searching... Unknown
Searching... Stillwater Public Library	158.2 MIL	Searching... Unknown

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Summary

When it comes to authenticity, is being fully yourself always worth the risk From the author of Blue Like Jazz comes New York Times bestseller Scary Close, Donald Miller's journey of uncovering the keys to a healthy relationship and discovering that they're also at the heart of building a healthy family, a successful career, and a trusted community of friends.

After decades of failed relationships and painful drama, Miller decided that he'd had enough. Trying to impress people wasn't helping him truly connect with anyone--and neither was pretending to be someone he wasn't. He'd built himself a life of public isolation, but he dreamed of having a life defined by meaningful relationships instead. At 40-years-old, he made a scary decision: he was going to be his true self no matter what it might cost.

Scary Close tells the story of Miller's difficult choice to impress fewer people and connect with even more. It's about the importance of knocking down old walls to finally experience the freedom that comes when we stop playing a part and start being fully ourselves.

In Scary Close, Miller shares everything he's learned firsthand about how to:

Deconstruct the old habits that no longer serve us Overcome the desire to please the people around us Always tell the truth, even when it's hard Find satisfaction in a daily portion of real love Risk being fully known in order to deeply love and be loved Apply these lessons to your everyday life

If you're ready to drop the act and find true, life-changing intimacy, it's time to get Scary Close.

Author Notes

Donald Miller is a best-selling author and public speaker based in Nashville, Tennessee who focuses on Christian spirituality.

Miller's first book, Prayer and the Art of Volkswagen Maintenance (Harvest House Publishers 2000), chronicled the cross-country road trip he took at age 21. It was printed with little fanfare, but it was republished more successfully in 2005 as Through Painted Deserts. Miller became a New York Times Bestselling Author when he published Blue Like Jazz in 2003. In 2004, Miller released Searching For God Knows What. In 2006, he added another book, To Own A Dragon. Don's next book, A Million Miles in a Thousand Years, was released in late 2009. His title Scary Close: Dropping the Act and Acquiring a Taste for True Intimacy became a New York Times bestseller in 2015.

In 2009 Miller began production of All Things Converge, a series of DVDs for small groups that feature Miller interviewing prominent Christian writers and theologians. The first three DVDs in the series were released in the fourth quarter of 2009.

(Bowker Author Biography)

Reviews (1)

Publisher's Weekly Review

More than five years after his last book, Miller (Blue Like Jazz) returns to his brand of telling it like it is-this time about relationships. In a conversational tone, he discloses thoughts about intimacy and how to find it: taking off the masks worn to hide the true self. The personality we show to the world often is that of a performer, created to hide who we are while trying to win approval and get attention, he says. Miller's contemplations come as the result of courting his wife, Betsy, who changed his thinking when it came to relationships with women. Older, married readers might chuckle at the author's description of Betsy as near perfect, but younger readers will relate to the frankly expressed concerns about pressure to fit in, difficulties in the dating scene, and hard lessons learned, some with the help of counseling. Short chapters tackle topics that range from personal memories and experiences to practical advice about factors that affect people as they develop relationships. Agent: Bryan Norman, Alive Literary. (Feb.) © Copyright PWxyz, LLC. All rights reserved.

Bob Goff

Foreword	p. xi
Author's Note	p. xv
1 The Distracting Noises of Insecurity	p. 1
2 You Are Good at Relationships	p. 9
3 Everybody's Got a Story and It's Not the One They're Telling	p. 15
4 Why Some Animals Make Themselves Look Bigger Than They Are	p. 23
5 Three Things I Learned About Relationships From Swimming in a Pond	p. 37
6 Performance Anxiety in Real Life	p. 53
7 The People We Choose to Love	p. 69
8 Control Freak	p. 81
9 Five Kinds of Manipulators	p. 99
10 Lucy in the Kitchen	p. 115
11 The Risk of Being Careful	p. 133
12 Great Parents Do This Well	p. 155
13 The Stuff of a Meaningful Life	p. 173
14 Do Men Do Intimacy Differently?	p. 187
15 You Will Not Complete Me	p. 205
16 The Place We Left Our Ghosts	p. 217
Acknowledgments	p. 227
About the Author	p. 231

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Summary

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Reviews (1)

Publisher's Weekly Review

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